Tuesday, April 10, 2007

My Beautiful Green Eyed Friend

"How have you been?" said Tania, my beautiful green-eyed friend. She was just clearing up the table after breakfast. The kids were in school and the baby was napping. She had wanted to talk to me about something.
"Pretty good... and how are you... and that hot-shot husband of yours? " I said winking at her and helping her with the dishes. She looked tired.
"Hey... Why don't I do the dishes and you sit down over here and fill me in on all the gossip!" I said pulling out a dining chair for her.
She sat down with a sigh and poured herself the leftover orange juice from a sparkling crystal jug.
" I have no gossip... unless... 'Sammy pooped 20 times yesterday', accounts for gossip!" she said, her green-eyes twinkling... which reminded me of the time just seven years ago, when she had got selected as the 'new face' of the a cosmetic company. She had just got the news and had forgotten to brush her hair and at six in the morning was knocking on my door...excited, it seemed, more about the little adventure of waking me up at six than her contract. Disheveled, but eyes full of fun... hope... life ... excitement.

"Uhmm.... no it doesn't!", I said with a wry smile. "Tell me... how did your interview at the advertising firm go?" I asked her.

"Oh that! ... Samyra; Rajiv thinks this isn't probably the best time for me to take up a job... with his yearly evaluation coming up and with the kids being so young and all...."

"So we decided that I should start again in a few years time" she said studying the dining table closely.

"hmmm... " I said drying the dishes.

"Come and sit down, I didn't call you here to do my dishes!"

"How are things with you... I am very worried about you Samyra", she asked searching my face for answers. She could look at you like she was looking into your soul and whatever you said, didn't matter.

"I am fine... I'll be better!" I said smiling back at her.

"I think you are in denial...You need to grow up...Honey, life isn't like we thought it was... it's not so simple...why don't you try for that job in advertising... it is still open you know and it pays so well...and maybe you'll meet someone there... you know you aren't getting any younger... "

"Tania... I love what I do"

"Sure you do... but why don't you try out something else... it's a great job you know... great benefits... you could still act in your spare time...acting really isn't something you can bank on... it works out for very few people...."

"And it will work out for me Tania."... I said quietly.

"Why are you being so tough? Samyra, grow up! Look at me Samyra... I have three wonderful children...a husband...I know he isn't Richard Gere... but he is good man... Remember, I wanted to be a dancer... perform all over the world... those are great fun dreams to have as a teen... kept us busy... But I am finally settled in life.. and I wish you would just grow up a little...It was okay as a childhood dream to want to become a super star! ...To wait for Prince Charming... I can't believe you turned down that wonderful chartered accountant from Punjab... stop being so naive girl... life is no fairy tale!"

"And I refuse to let it become a nightmare Tania! "

"A nightmare?" Her lovely green eyes froze with some strange thought.

" I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I gave up on the one thing that I want to do and if I started treating it like my last priority ... and expecting to make it... I would be fooling myself."

"I think it is about time you started fixing your life, Samyra".

"Tania...But it ain't even broken!" I said... almost near tears... she just didn't get me anymore.

"Oh honey, don't cry... I am just trying to help you." said Tania lovingly.

1 comment:

Sri said...

hey! nice!

it reminds me of something i wrote

I was floating in the fumes my eyes burned like an amber in a winter fire
The air felt cold, my angels were numb
Every thing was gray, as if the clouds made up their minds and gave up the sky.
I took a deep breath, and Smelled roses and ashes
My thoughts kicked in. my fists tightened.
My hands were empty, I couldn't tell what I had
I waited for lightening, I waited for my angels.

I waited for the phoenix that flew me around
the Silence was So loud my ears went deaf
The gray was So white my vision didn't make sense
I begged my soul to wake me up if i am in a dream
it cried out to me like a Christmas child
Told me I won't grow old
And asked me to open my hands
I looked at my hands and they were open
My eyes widened and I could see
No more needles and nails, no more dragons and Titans
And then I moved.

 
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